Bernhard Mikoleit

What I have to go out of my way for

„Ich setzte den Fuß in die Luft, –  und sie trug.“  (I set my foot upon the air – and it carried me)
The line by Hilde Domin has moved me for a long time, partly because of the German lyricist’s own story. Taking a risk. Putting trust in yourself and in life. The proposition made in the poem is certainly no reference to a simple formula we can effortlessly apply. To me, it speaks to a serious challenge: I for one do not always find it easy to respond to life with courage.

What shaped me

Experiencing what it means to take a wrong turn at university, choosing the wrong subject and still going through with it. Experiencing, as a teacher for adolescents with behavioural problems, how powerfully positive good human relationships can be. Feeling the limits of self-optimisation and of optimising systems as a business consultant. In neuromarketing, catching a glimpse of the potential of the subconscious and of how little we know about what navigates us forcefully. And in the medical field (in compliance research, to be precise), getting to realise that meaning in life brings about vital energy and joy, even when there is pain.

Why I started working on my strengths

My favourite term is aliveness.  Social therapist Hartmut Rosa suggests that we only become alive once we enter into relationships with the “other” in a way they change us, in such a way that we change with and through otherness. Initially, the “other”, to me, was life happening while I was busy making plans. Aliveness, to me, grew primarily out of exchanging ideas with others. I received feedback and evolved in dialogue with others. I was fortunate enough to meet many remarkable people, who helped me do it.

Deliberating the notion of strength

In my work, I came across a thought-provoking theory: People can only ever consciously decide on something if they deem a given step suitable for them, if they know their strengths, and if they consider them when making that decision. Think about this. If true, would this not be a powerful realisation? What opportunities would result from the theory for you?

One more thing

My experience tells me that an inner attitude that allows you to see yourself in a positive light will help you find your strengths. Trying to develop realistic expectations and tolerate disappointment will help, as will trying to accept yourself with both your strengths and weaknesses. Your reward will be that you are free from having to defend an idealised and possibly wrong self-concept. If you succeed at that, more or less at least, the view will clear, and you will be able to see hidden strengths. Sounds difficult? It is! This is probably where you have to go back to Hilde Domin: Set your foot upon the air. Give it a try…